the BEST we can do is BREATHE and REBOOT

The best way to describe my day. Why let the little things drag you down? So far this week my friends and I combine have celebrated a birthday, survived a mugging at gun point, almost walked into a bank being robbed, had a flat tire, served Bob Saget and taken a header onto a bar floor. 

                                      tomorrow we are buying a loto ticket. 

a ghost lurks

Though a person may leave your life... I have found that their ghost can be difficult to shake. The ghost that reminds you to be more cautious as you enter a new situation-never knowing what is waiting behind the next turn. The next move... unknown. The ghost that makes you hesitate before entering a dark room... or make you question who is staring back at you as you look into the mirror.

Im finding that at a sign of hope-my ghost is screaming at me- reminding me of what people are capable of... especially when you let your guard down. The unexpecting fool. 

But the real question... can a ghost of your past help you...? Scare you straight down the right path?  Helping your realize that there are people that you should avoid- situations that scream- get out... leave! Remember me?!  Im hoping that the ghost following me will help me remember... proceed with caution.

It's a funny thing. I don't believe in ghosts. 

Clay Street

Tonight is a very bitter sweet moment in my life. It's really unbelievable that I am leaving the place that I've called home for the past three years. It is not the exact exit that I had imagined... but it is what it is. Or at least that is what I keep telling myself. Everything happens for a reason.... blah blah blah. Cliches that comfort us as we come across difficult things in our lives.

My favorite time of day on Clay is sunset- I decided to sit on my roof one last time as the sun was setting... a view of the city that I never grow tired of seeing. I couldn't help but feeling a bit emotional as I was thinking about everything that I had experienced at this house. The dinners, drinks, late nights, super late nights, early mornings, study sessions, fights, laughs and more laughs, singing, loving, tears, parties... 

Memories made and memories lost... and I decided to take the recent advice of a dear friend-- stop take a deep breath and take it all in. I closed my eyes... took a deep breathe and took it all in. The air was crisp and freezing and for the first time I could hear the church bells from Grace Cathedral sound in the new hour. I wanted to freeze this moment-- and in a way I believe I did. 

I know that another place will become my home in the future- but a part of my heart will always be with clay. It is the first place that I made my home away from home. 

So here's to clay street... thanks for all the good times <3

Rain on Me

It's funny how a smell... a song... an image can be so charged- The electricity behind an unexpected occurrence... can instantly bring back a sense of deep sadness, bright hope or even just a happy memory. 

It's raining today in Orange County. As I walked out of the Fine Arts building most of my fellow OCC students stood under the safety of the awning without a plan on how to stay dry as they ventured on their long walk back to their cars... but the second I walked out of the door- I felt more at home than I have since I returned to OC last week. I walked happily into the heavy rainfall under the safety of my trusty umbrella.

The smell of rain instantly brought me back. San Francisco. The place Ive made my home- the city that holds my heart.

The rain will come and go. Just like my time in Orange County... but my connection and love for the city and the friends that have become my family will always stay. And for that I am forever thankful. 

I started this blog in hopes to leave a record of bits and pieces of my thoughts as they come and go!  In the words of those who came before me. Seeking peace, generosity, humbleness, love and happiness--With love from me to you....

<3h